Lombardi Trophy Details NFC East Scandal....Regrets Lost Opportunity.
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In the mist of the Harvey Weinstein sex scandal the NFL Lombardi Trophy has stepped forward and revealed several past correlations between itself and several NFL franchises.
In an Exclusive interview with X-News the Lombardi claims it regrets never having the opportunity to date the Eagles franchise.
“Yes., I mean we came close a couple of times., especially in 2005. But they would just never fully commit. I mean they kept promising to “Swoop” me off my pedestal but when it got serious...you know.... they just weren’t able to.....well.... “fly eagles fly”.
When asked if there were some type of negative chemistry between itself and bird teams Lombardi quickly chimed in: “I don’t know? Maybe? I mean I remember all I did was LOOK at the Cardinals and they ran out of here. *(The East - Ed.) Haven’t been back in 30 years! And the Falcons got cold feet and left me hanging.”
Inquiring if its two date romance with the Ravens was an exception a sly smile came across the trophy as it exclaimed: “Eagles are bald., Ravens..., well.., Ravens are Black! You HAVE to go back!”
Pointing out the Eagles are actually looking pretty good this season and could they be given another chance to impress the Trophy says: “I doubt it. I mean they never pay ANY attention to me no matter HOW sparkly I make myself for them. It’s ALWAYS COWBOYS, COWBOYS, COWBOYS with them! Maybe it’s an age thing. They ARE over 30 years older than me. But every current East team has shown me a nice time but them. I won’t hold my breath.
With contributing Editor XF.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.