Sturgis Airport Renovation
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(AP) Sturgis, Kentucky Governor Bevin announced today that the Sturgis Municipal Airport would be receiving a $31.8 Billion Aviation Grant for renovations to the decades-old infrastructure. "I had to fly into that airport for a fundraising event [on my private jet] and the runway was a little bumpy. It was very uncomfortable" said Bevin in the Wednesday morning press conference. Plans are to re-pave the 5,000 foot runway, install a coffee bar inside of the main terminal, and to replace the flags on the flag poles. Bevin added, "I don't know if they want to name this airport after me, but Bevin Aviation has a nice ring to it." Other plans include adding an outdoor surround sound speaker system so that patrons getting off of personal or commercial aircraft can feel more welcome to the airport. Bevin noted that "no one wants to get off of a plane and have to walk to a motorcade without ambiance. It's very somber." When asked what type of music that would be playing, Bevin simply replied "Something catchy." Although Bevin has no current plans to ever visit the airport again, a local official commented "I think it's a good thing what he's doing. Will it cost the city money? Yes. Will taxes increase? Yes. But he is the Governor and if he thinks it's good, I do too." A spokesman for the airport said that he could not comment on this developing story. Stay tuned for more information.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.